Watashi No Sekaii

The Lingering Scent of Rain

2010-03-20T01:43:00.000-07:00

I think of you

After the rain

Looking at the grey skies

I try to see your face

In vain

I think of you

In the chilly air

Catching the smell of rain

I see me smiling with you

In our cozy living room

Towering above the city lights

I think of you

Whenever it doesn’t stop to rain

A life with you

I’d be a store lady

You’d come meet me when evening paints the clouds

We’d go off for dinner

Then stroll through the whispers of the soft drizzle

I think of you

In every chance of rain

Hoping someday we’ll meet

Bad Hair Day = Bad Luck Day

2010-01-31T01:12:00.001-08:00

I have experience occations or a day when all unhappy events happen in an unforgettble formulaic sequence. When such moments arrived, I declared the day to be my 'bad luck day'. Then, as if by a bad omen, more unusually 'bad luck' occurences started lining up to make my day worse.

Yesterday was the start of a feel good weekend. On friday, after a week of hard work, I decided to make the best out of the weekend, and enjoy myself to the fullest. Taking my mind off work and not answering any stress-related messages sounded like a good start - and it did. Until the moment I decided to have a haircut.

Hair is the most important accessory of a 21st century modern-minded career woman. Style your hair right, and you can survive the worst traffic jam, or the most stubborn photocopier machine. Style your hair wrong... well, a typo error could immensely worsen your day.

After owning two fantastic hairstyles, my hair grew out of the second one, and was beginning to resemble the mop in the back of the cleaning cupboard of my kitchen, so I decided that it was time to pick up the third fantastic hairstyle this weekend. I went to sleep dreaming about my new hairstyle on Friday night.

Saturday arrived, and I went back to hairsalon that faithfully gave me the first two outstanding styles. I was excited to fastforward to the moment my hair receives its brand new look. But when I pushed open the door, and saw the salon packed with aunties and young girls, I could see an invisible hammer smashing my dream to pieces. Every female in Singapore was fighting to get a good hairstyle by Chinese New Year - guess we all think alike. Unfortunately, the difference between them and me is an advance call to the salon to take up a one liner in the record book. Thus, besides glares and stares from everyone crammed up in the tiny salon, I was also welcomed by the stylists' fashionable backs - they had been so busy since morning, they had not even the time to take a toilet break, or to inform me that they had been busy since morning.

I left the place feeling a bit down. That was when the bad luck started. The sun started beaming its ferocious rays at me, with a vengeance to turn me into a charcoal, and the taxis were beginning to avoid me. I go on this street, they jam up the opposite one; I switched sides, they turn to jam up the previous one that I had been on. When I finally gotten into the back of a cab, after thirty minutes of being under the tyranny of the Sun, I was fuming with anger. I was starting to get a little bit personal with the salon. I decided that I will get my third fantastic hairstyle at another salon. The anger of standing under the Sun playing hide and seek with the taxis made me desperate in proving myself correct. So I went home, take out my laptop and start researching.

In the evening, I made my way to the hairsalon and waited excitedly to get my third fantastic haircut. My nerves quieten down while the stylist did her magic with my hair. After an hour, I looked myself in the mirror, I was horrified. Staring back at me was a middle age aunty. My superstitious self started to surface, I paid the stylist with a weak smile and hastily left the place.

Why hadn't I paid attention to the signs? The taxi hide and seek and the smashing of my dream at Hair Salon A earlier today. Why didn't I see this coming? There had already been hints of my bad luck for the day. I shouldn't have gotten the haircut today. Being a day of bad luck, EVERYTHING can go wrong. Even the toilet bowl will not flush properly after I use it.

Fighting to ignore all the glares from people who walked passed me, I raced back home and locked myself indoors. I decided to seal in my fate of possessing the world's ugliest hairstyle, until my brother suggested a hairsalon for me to save my hair. I had to wait until the next day, and with the utter disappointment from my new haircut, I had no mood to enjoy the first day of a supposed nice relaxing weekend.

When Sunday arrived, I jumped out of bed, grabbed my sister and dashed to VivoCity's TEAM SALON. After another round of hide and seek with the taxis, we took the faithful train to Harbour Front and arrived at the doorstep of the salon my brother had mentioned to me last night.

Immediately I was sent to a seat, and almost at once, a hairstylist greeted me. He was also kind enough to greet my ridiculous hair style. We discussed about the blunt style my hair received, and what could be done to shape it up, he started working almost immediately. The conversations we had were very relaxing, and the stylist appeared very skilful with his scissors, so my nerves finally ease down for the day. When he was done, I felt elated once again. I could see myself staring back at me once again. The world felt good once again.

The bad luck seemed to have disappear with the fourth new hairstyle because I was able to get a good seat in SushiTei without having to wait for an exceptionally long time. I'm not sure about the taxis, but frankly they were never there when you need them. At least, I'm very sure my bad day is over.

World of Taste and Sluurrp! - Taipei 2

2009-12-17T21:33:00.000-08:00

-At Dan shui Old Street-

Fried Octopus (Japanese Hua Zhi)

Xiao Zai Mian

(Native Taiwanese Noodles, resembling our normal yellow noodles)

Clams cooked in Native Gingerish Soup

Yam and Sweet Potato Riceball Dessert

-Native Taiwanese Eatery near Ximending-

Lu Pork belly (Native taiwanese style)

Lu Pork (Native Taiwanese style)

Lu Bean Curd (Native Taiwanese style)

Wun Dun Mian

(Taiwanese rendition of Wanton noodles with Flower Egg. The ancient saying, or rather the genuine Chinese saying, of wanton is actually wun dun.)

Flower Egg with Noodles

(the egg was supposedly cooked in boiling water to achieve the smooth pale yellow texture and flowery appearance - interesting dish)

-Ancient Cuisine - (old Chinese style)

Sweet and Sour Pork - Vintage style

(Really queer and vintage. Looked steamed, but it is not. The sauce is sweet and sour, but it is not cooked in the modern way. Something very ancestory about this dish.

Beancurd fried with Bean Pate and Lard
(Queer taste - yet delicious. Every ingredient was well mixed to bring out the overall flavour. Though such a dish is nowhere near modern style.)

Little Buddha Jump Over the Wall

(Queer taste - but also delicious. Nothing like a modern dish. Bits of dried shrimps wer found, and the golden round thing is actuall fried pigeon egg (resembling "tie dan" or metal egg))

- Yong Kang street-

Black Sesame Paste Pastry
(The pastry layers are really soft and slightly crisp, and the roasted black sesame paste is really fragrant with its original taste well-kept to reach your taste buds at every bite)

- Back to Night Market at Ximending-

Japanese Crepes

Taiwanese Chicken Cooked in Rice Wine

It's a "wait, wait..." society

2009-12-17T20:22:00.000-08:00

Everywhere we turn to people are asking us to wait. Different languages spoken to ask for the same thing from us. "Wait a moment, please." or "Wait ar." Or even "Qing shao deng yi xia.". How long is that "moment" actually going to be - well, who knows? Not even the person who had asked you to wait.

Sick and tired of waiting, Singaporeans developed a culture of "kiasuism". Because waiting consumes time, and time is precious, it cannot be retrieved no matter what, therefore to reduce the extensive waste of time, they become "kiasu". To the world outside, this may seemed a bad reflection of their principles of life - they are desperate not to lose out. But is it really just that?

Although not a native, but living in Singapore for so many years, I too feel the need to be kiasu sometimes. I came to realise that every corner of this country is requesting for the same thing, and such a request is possibily one of the reasons that cultivated an intrinsic "kiasu-ism" in every native. If we miss a bus or a train, we might have to wait for another ten to fifteen minutes for the next one, so why wait? Why not die-die get on this one, so I don't have to do the waiting? (I might also escaped the terror of getting marked for being late.)

There are also other things that required true blue waiting. If I need to process an important legal document, I need to first take a half-day (or maybe, a whole day) leave from work, then proceed to the building to do the processing. There, I have to first wait in line for about twenty minutes to get my queue number, and the brief information about which counter I had to proceed to. After which, I had to possibly wait for another hour, before the number on the screen finally revealed the number on my queue ticket. Then, when the moment I've been waiting for has arrived, but after a brief audience with the consultant or officer, I noticed that the actual processing of the document took only ten minutes. Shortly afterwhich, I'm back to waiting for another hour (worst case scenario - maybe two) to make payment, which, needless to say, took only five minutes. As the number of processing stages increases, my waiting time increases, and half of my day's time (worst case scenario - whole day) will be exhausted. When I leave the building, there is just enough time to go home for dinner.

Yes, our voices are heard. Our pleads are well-received. The solution? Customer service hotline, and online services. Good or bad? You decide. For me - the customer service is just another portal for the same request. "Our care consultants are busy at the moment. Your call is important to us. Please wait, and we'll attend to you shortly." And of course, I was attended to after waiting for one hour, with the phone tightly tugged to my right ear. I bet many users of such supposed solutions to longer waiting time might have provided their heartfelt feedback to the "customer service people", but so far, the wait goes on.

Of course voicing out problems is one thing, finding the appropriate solution is another. As customers, we do expect the people servicing us to "solve the problem". But often people wonder - how? Well, there are countries on the globe in our vicinity who has set pretty good examples. They might not have entirely solved the problem, but they provided solutions that actually better the situation; not make it worse. They promised to reduce the frequency of asking customers to wait, and they did. They ensure that waiting time will be shortened, and they did. I mean seriously, if the best you can do is this, us, being on the receiving end of your service, would truly appreciate the effort, as there are signs of improvement.

So much for yapping on a bad experience with customer care service hotline. I mean, frankly, they do care - I can definitely feel the sincerity. But unfortunately, maybe they are busy caring for so many people, they sincerely needed you to wait a moment, please, before they could shower you with the same attention.

"My hand is holding one's hand, yet my heart holds another's - who holds the greater pain?"

2009-12-17T02:37:00.000-08:00

A show that explores in detail about revenge and forgiveness. Guy on the right killed the elder brother of the guy on the left, 12 years ago, when everyone was still in their teens. The death coincidentally caused another death - the mother of the guy on the left. Unfortunately for him, the two deaths wiped out his entire family, and in addition, brought down the reputation of his family name. Thu, naturally, he vows to get even with the guy on the right, in due time. So, using 12 years, he single handedly planned his revenge.
Like all shows of this genre, as the story goes, the guy on the left gradually falls in love, and hangs onto the little piece of human soul still left within him. He is torn between fufilling his supposed destiny and acknowledging the existence of the only person who understood his pain.
A very common plot about revenge and forgiveness, but what makes this series unique and outstanding is the details.
The people needed to be killed for revenge was murdered under naturally occuring incidences and accidents that were cleverly maneuvered. There were no traces of anything that will evidently point towards the mastermind or threaten to surface his name. By the middle of the series, when every event starts falling into place, you'll realise that his plot for revenge moves like a chess game, and with each brilliant flawless move he makes, he gets closer to checkmate.
However, the director also captured the emotional parts of the series in an intrinsic fashion that makes the audience feel for the characters and what they would likely experience at different stages of the plot - especially for the guy on the right and the left. For example, in the early episodes, you will enjoy the victories with the guy on the left as his plot succeeds, but in the later episodes, when the plot starts involving more lives, and you see the guy on the right repenting deeply for his past actions, you start wanting the guy on the left to stop his plotting. I guess the collaboration between the director and the acting cast accurately displayed all the emotions through the different parts of the series.
I really enjoyed every bit of this show.

Oldies?

2009-11-04T06:07:00.000-08:00

Here are the list of songs which I shall aim to revisit and listen to again:

Take That - Back for Good, How deep is your love, Relight my Fire, Babe

NKOTB - By my valentine, Please don't go girl

BB Mak - Come Back

O Town - Liquid Dreams (Hahahaha... I use to despise this song, but I have to concede it is nice and groovy. Something special when it was first broadcasted.)

Human Nature - I Wish, Last Christmas

Bossan - One in a million

These songs really remind me of the late night radio listening sessions with my roomate, who is also my favourite cousin (I use to reside with her family because I was enrolled in a school far away from home), and the hushed up midnight video watching on TV sessions with her.

We use to creep downstairs to the living room from our room, and switched on the TV just to catch the top 10 videos listed in the US, broadcasted on channel 5 (then known as SBC something). Everyone, especially the ruling adults of the household, was fast asleep in their beds.

These midnight sneaks eventually came to a standstill when my cousin advanced to college, and then university. During her absence, since she moved to the hostels in her uni campus, I don't really enjoy the company of the others, thus I decided to stay in my room, listen to radio till late in the nights.

Those were the comforting times when I was away from home. I'm glad I could still remember =)

Oldies?

2009-11-04T05:43:00.000-08:00

It never crossed my mind that the songs I loved and enjoyed years back have stopped playing frequently on the radio. Even if they were played, people would've forgotten that they were once well-loved by the masses.

A conversation about boy bands, NKOTB and Backstreet Boys, The Hansons and The Moffats, came up unintentionally today, and it also spurred me to check on the list of once popular, now forgotten, boybands online.

Guess what - the brief research led me to back to the songs which I've loved, and sad to say, have forgotten all about (since my first computer crashed and burn, and all the hundreds of songs I've collected from friends were never revived).

It's even sadder to learn that some of the songs I remembered enjoying can't be found in music search engines - I can't listen to the mp3 versions of them. So I went to YOUTUBE, and got the music videos. Thank god!

It seems rather warming to listen to these music once again. Makes you truly feel the changing times, and how many years have passed us by.

LFO (Check out their videos "Girl on TV", "Summertime", "I don't wanna Kiss you Goodnight" on YouTube - really missed them!)

Let Loose (Only one song I enjoyed from them - their remake of "Make it with you". Very romantic and weddingly)

Belle Epoque

2009-10-23T23:31:00.000-07:00

Every heard of "Coffee Prince"?
A korean drama centred around coffee beans and cafe.
I've always yearn to live in the soft, natural, and earthly atmosphere captured in the show. So to kinda bluff myself into believing that I'm truly living in it, I tried to get my hands on the music that partly created the mood in the drama.

My sister and I bought the soundtrack, and we waste no time listening to it.
I especially love the light-hearted, warm and fuzzy mood of the tunes by 'Tearliner' and 'Belle Epoque'.

Tearliner doesn't exactly draw your tears out, but they do make you feel what they intend to with their rhythms. The ones by Belle Epoque, albeit only one available in the soundtrack, will more likely lure you to the dreamy mood felt when the first glimpse of light ray hits memories of droplets left behind by a crazy storm, and you miraculously hear the first note sung by a chirping bird. You might even start to picture Paris, a city of romance and love. (Well, I guess Italy might be a better analogy, but you know what I mean.) Yup, the soft melodious chimes in Belle Epoque's "May" does do such wonders.

Tummy ache

2009-10-13T09:32:00.000-07:00

I always feel that no one understands me. No living person in this world can grasp the full meaning of a twitch of my brows; or a crease on my forehead. Only I know. Only me.

Well, I guess it's just a reason I use to excuse myself from learning to communicate effectively with people around me. We (well, people who are like me) enjoy making up stories, realistic ones, to console ourselves when things go terribly wrong, and thus allowing us the calmness to move on with our lives.

When I graduated from university with a major in Engineering, not Literature nor English, both of which I have interest in, I automatically thought back to the days when my parents made plans for my future path. I figured that their plans were the reason to where I am standing now, which is not truly what I had in mind. I begin lamenting their efforts and guidance, believing that they were the ones responsible for my destroyed hopes and dreams.

But... was it really their fault? I never really thought about what I really want to be until I become a full potential working adult. It never crossed my mind what I need to do to get to where I want to be. It certainly never came to me that I need to stand up for myself, make my own decisions to live the life I wanted. I let them make plans for me. It has always been me.

If I really knew that I wanted to be writer, I would have studied hard for my English papers, and insisted on taking Literature as one of my majors during my education path. No... I simply let nature takes its own course; and nature, having too much in its agenda, decides to just listen to my parents' ideas and suggestions. Naturally, I became an Engineer on cert - someone my dad would love to be when he grew up, maybe.

It is really wonderful if you start paying attention to your future, and give it some thought; and not just any thoughts spurred by wild fantasies, but those which stemmed from constant observation of the society we live in. The sooner you wander about it, the better you are at taking control of your life. Then to take the lead in your life effectively, and live your dream life eventually, of course, we must not forget to make wise decisions, knowing full well that such a privilege comes with expensive consquences.

I slowly figured that to make wise decisions for ourselves, we still do need to take in advices, suggestions, ideas, and warnings from those around us who possess more experience. We are the rulers of our lives; and we govern with the guidance of our wise advisors (who also happen to be our full-time welfare officers).

Touching views

2009-09-23T07:07:00.000-07:00

Lazy morning and afternoon

2009-09-23T06:28:00.000-07:00

They are not playing dead - they are taking a good nap! These cats of the ground-floor neighbours of my block really know how to live life to the fullest man. Everytime I walk pass them they show me a new way to sleep on the cool ground in style. (And they do really sleep like humans.)

Hong Kong Cafe

2009-09-23T06:16:00.000-07:00

Very very delicious and tasty! I ate the chicken chop cheese baked rice - FORGOTTEN TO TAKE A SHOT OF IT!!! Darn...

And thanks to my beloved mum, I'm now an official member of this restaurant! One of my favourite eateries! Love the food here (except the Pork chop papaya soup noodles - the combination of milk and pungent porky taste in the soup gives a weird feeling to my taste buds), the music they play and the friendly ambience.

Used to be packed with people even until the eleventh hour in the night. Guess the opening of a new branch at Ion Orchard really dispersed the crowd.... we have more chances of taking the private couch seats!

National Geographic - clothing line?

2009-09-12T10:08:00.000-07:00

Saw this in Vivo many times, never thought it is a shop that sells not only magazines...I mean it is National Geographic right? The magazine right?

But when I walked in, there were so many clothes on racks prepared nicely to be sold to a traveller or someone with passion to travel once in a while.

Of course there are still books and magazines from N.G., but there are also collecticbles from them - antique tables, bookshelves, vases and chinaware - on sale.

A different Japanese 'Marche' in Tampines

2009-09-12T09:32:00.000-07:00

Just visited Tampines 1 today - yes, it has opened quite sometime ago, and I only visited it NOW. Well, frankly, I only patronised VivoCity 6 months after it first opened; and Ion Orchard - 1 month after it first opened. I have yet been inside Orchard Central.

So today I brought my parents and sister to Tampines, and we just stroll into Tampines 1 unknowingly. Only inside then I realised that we're in one of the new malls in Tampines.

We haven't had lunch yet, so we walked around to browse through every restaurant. Then, we discovered this marche conceptualised Japanese restaurant. There were samples displayed outside the restaurant, and one look at them, without a second thought, we went in. Man, were we awed...

This is very delicious. Something I've never tried before - it's potato and cabbage mashed together into egg and fried. Toppings are mayo, cheese and a brown japanese taste sauce

Love everything in this bento - except the salmon; it's a bit too dry - and a must try. Especially the chawan mushii - its appearance does not keep up with its unique delicious taste. There's lots of stuff in the steamed egg - not just the usual crabstick and ginko nut. The greyish look has a reason - a genuine example of 'don't judge a book by its cover' - don't judge the taste of a chawan mushii by its colour and appearance.

Superlicious dessert - ice cream on top of cornflakes. Right is vanilla ice cream with black honey poured delicately over it. Left is mixed vanilla-green tea ice cream. The ice cream has a very smooth texture, like that of Mcdonald's, but is very sticky, just like Ben n Jerry's. Must try.

Seafood Omurice - sauce is not very appetising, but the rice is really richly flavoured with tomato sauce. The sotongs and mussels were rather overcooked and not soaked with the tomato taste, as it looked like it should.

Family Style

2009-09-12T09:26:00.001-07:00

My new yellow rubber slip ons from UniQlo

Second Paragon of Orchard Singapore

2009-09-12T09:06:00.001-07:00

R Burger

A German Shop that sells lots of intrinsically handmade wooden toys. There are some as small as our fingertips.

Love this window display. Too bad it was close when I reached. Couldn't go in to have a good look.

Interior of Ion Orchard - does look a bit like Taipei 101

Some interesting styles from someone close to me

2009-09-11T08:45:00.001-07:00

Flapper Style

2009-09-11T08:37:00.000-07:00

A stunning return to the famous style of all women during the roaring twenties by the ever beautiful, inside and outside, Drew Barrymore.

Is it really nuts when you are not wearing a mask?

2009-09-11T08:27:00.000-07:00

One eccentric persona with a fantastically expressive vocals. I admire her very much - her voice, her determination to tear off the mask forced onto her by everyone beside her, and especially her sense of style.

A very weird style of course - but it works tremendously well on her.
And... it is hard to copy

Adriana Lima - a superb supermodel, who is a famous walker of the Victoria Secret runway - posing as the iconic Amy Winehouse. I think she did a great job portraying the singer - the vibe is certainly there.

Every woman is an angel, every woman has a secret

2009-09-11T08:23:00.000-07:00

Must not miss annual Victoria's Secret Fashion Show - remind myself to catch it each year!

Danielle

2009-09-11T08:19:00.000-07:00

I do admire her strength and persistence.

It's truly something memorable from the ANTM series and educational for the younger generations who yearn to be someone standing tall in the world.

Model Madness

2009-09-11T08:09:00.000-07:00

I feel very strongly about these photos after watching so many cycles of ANTM. After watching other international versions of this fashion reality show, each having their own viewer attractions and boring moments, in the end, the original fanchise from America does have its strong stand.

Triangle

2009-08-30T05:38:00.000-07:00

The first scene really captures your full attention.

The director brings you to the crime scene that was in place in the year 1984 at a river bank. As the camera backens to reveal the detail of the crim scene bit by bit, he instills within you the emotions felt gradually. You know that something is wrong; something bad has happened, and you want to find out if what you thought is true. Then, when you finally see it, your heart is gripped tightly at the image of a motionless 10 year old girl dressed in a scarlett coat, lying sideways.

The camera moved to show a greater angle on the scene, you will be introduced to the main character in the show - a 10 year old boy, classmate of the murdered girl - and he was standing next to the dead girl, with his hands covered in blood. You then hear his labourious breathing, and see that he looked dumbfounded.

Then as the story unfolds 25 years laters, you would discover more about the main character, his story, his relationship with the girl, and how her death had traumatised him through the years.

I really enjoyed every bit of this show. Every second of it was enticing and captivating. The director and his cast really did a fantastic job in telling the tale. There is of course a twist at the end - when the murderer was announced - albeit in a way that leaves the audience stupified.

Not forgetting the music - salute to Hayashi Yuki and all the musicians who created the heart-gripping notes and had the creativity of mixing it with angelic sounds to describe the mood of the entire show.

It's not something you want to miss watching.

Morphing

2009-08-30T05:21:00.000-07:00

In the past, I wasn't daring enough to try new things - haircuts, dresses, food.

Guess time does add a bit of confidence into your heart and mind. Or maybe the courage comes from the heck-care attitude I've acquired recently. Well, what actually inspired me to chop off almost everything from the last style is probably the stress at work. I don't know about most people, but I do feel a significant amount of weight being lifted off my shoulders when the scissors went snip snip.

Something to concede - my heart was racing when the stylist snipped off a large lengths of hair at one go. It wasn't until I see the entire hairdo, did I become calm again. Nonetheless, I was prepared for the worse.

My Sista the Fashion Lover

2009-08-30T05:14:00.001-07:00

The white blouse was part of her graduation gown, and after the ceremony, for a casual dinner, she just added a black cotton shorts with black stockings. Her dark yellow-greenish shoes resemble the vintage Chinese cloth shoes worn by daughters of wealthy families.

Love the style.

Symbols of Eternal Love

2009-08-30T04:01:00.001-07:00

I attended quite a bit of wedding ceremonies from friends and relatives. They were enough for me to see a variety of bridal gowns. The ones that I really adore were inserted here.

This one reminded me of a glamorously delicious wedding cake. One not commonly used in local wedding banquets. I do love the thick cushy layers that make up most of the design of this particular dress. (The pins are not part of the design - the dress was not made to my friend's size yet so they were used to hold the dress in place... I guess it's time to face the facts my friend - you are NOT as fat as you think you were...so stop saying that you are!)

This dress was also picked by my friend. It's a simple tube dress from up-waist. After a thin strip of pale pinkish belt, the remaining of the dress was covered by speckles of roses made from satin. Thing is, it doesn't look fantastic on the hangar, but it does made my friend looked like a darling princess when it was put on her.

My friend chose to wear this dress on the day of her marriage registration. It's a very cutesy little outfit which suited her perfectly. It adds more curves to her figure, and gave her a look she never put on before until this day. I think it also gave her all the strength and courage she needs as a young bride.

May you two be blessed with all the love in this world - stay happy forever!

I attended my very first Indian wedding! Love the bridal gown - both the modern and traditional one.

The white gown comes with a small hat, with satin overflowing from the top that supposedly covers her face. Here she pushed it behind herself, so the effect can't really be seen.

The entire white outfit just feels like a vintage English dress from the Victorian days.

Their entrance was embraced by the classic magical fantasy from a young girl's imagination - the gust of dry ice breeze, the pool, and the beatiful flowered arch. It's not hard to feel their special bond as they slowly make their way through the crowd, hand in hand.

I was told that a traditional Indian wedding costume weighs tons. In addition to the masses of jewellery around her neck, wrists and fingers, gifted from family and relatives, I was appalled to learn that the bride usually could not move at all! Shocking! The bride would be in a state of slight discomfort that she would not be able to smile naturally on the big day. Women do pay a high price for beauty, I guess. All for the sake of the biggest day of her life. =)

New album - Sodagreen

2009-07-22T06:54:00.000-07:00

The lead singer is back with a new look - pink-do.

If you are a die hard Sodagreen fan, you will know that their lead singer is THE fashionista in the band. From the youthful casual look in the first album, to punk rock, GASTBY-style hair-do in the second album, to the nerdish, Narimiya-wear look, to now, the flourescent-unpopular-amongst-guys pink hair look. I think each style really portrays the feel of the music in a particular album.

It definitely takes real confidence to wear a hair colour likeable by most females. (Even they don't do that hair colour.)

Check out their latest album - it seems an effort to showcase the purity of genuine natural beauty in their music. It's still a blend of classical music and modern pop, but they've added a bit of the Taiwanese highlands flavour. Very Sodagreen.

One of their latest MV - directed by their manager - very artistic frames throughout the entire video. Takes you into a natural fantasy world that has not underwent plastic surgery.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=n_PiK8qVzx4

Artistic SodaGreen

2009-07-10T07:47:00.001-07:00

The artistic side of this popular Taiwanese band. I love the photos they used as their posters, or covers of their albums. They really speak more and louder than words do, and they get the listener into the mood of the band's songs.

I like the blend between the tricycle and the clear blue sky. Makes my mind wanders back into childhood days, and I will sigh at the fact that time passes so quickly.

Sometimes you just want to explore the world alone. Face the ups and downs of life alone. When you are staring at your own back, you realised how strong you had become. Suddenly, you don't feel embarassed about being the lonely figure in a crowd of cliques and groups anymore.

A time to look at nature in the most natural way. Nature has its own flaws. Grasses are never fully green. The moon is not of a perfect circle. But, such flaws amplifies the beauty of nature. It enhances the authenticity of the world we are living in. We are the souls of this reality, and we should be living our lives to the fullest.

I like the simplicity of this picture. Just a person, enjoying his own time, and his own hobby. The white background just blanks your mind in an instant, and all you can do is just focus on the person in the picture, trying hard to hear the notes he is playing. Silence. Peace. Tranquility. Serenity.

The world is such a huge place. We are but just tiny ants to the massive clouds gently swaying in the breeze above us. Our worries are but just a speck of dust, and nothing is worser than thinking that they occupy a significant part of the world than clouds. The latter is covering the globe, and engulfing us. So nothing is larger than them. If they can be easily swayed by the smallest breeze, so can our worries.

SodaGreen's songs are as artistic as their posters and cover albums. The band share their joy, insights into life, enlightenments, and all other human emotions, through each note and word.

Like they always say - listen with your heart, and you'll see.

Midnight grumbles (I)

2009-07-07T07:50:00.001-07:00

Each time when the late hours of the night arrives, I feel at home.
I feel at ease.
I can do lots of things like read a book, that I've been wanting to read since I bought it a month ago; write about thoughts that has been stuck in my mind, waiting impatiently to be expressed in the most accurate manner; and think about my life.

Reflection. I always reflect on my life. Think about what I have done for the past few days, or hours. Think about what I have done for my love ones. Think about what I have achieved as a living person.

Chocolates. Nope. Can't eat chocolates now. It's near midnight. I refrained from eating anything sweet since my first year in university. For diet. To shed some kilos. To make myself more presentable before the opposite sex. To feel more confident. It worked - I lost 7 kilos by the time I graduated from the palce. And I learned to enjoy sugarless black coffee and tea. All the cakes, sweets and offers of midnight snacks were sacrificed for a good cause. I thought.

Unfortunately, by my second year in the working world, I let myself loose and devoured on all the sweet things that came into my sight. Laugh. So much for dieting. 2 kilos came back.

I've been trying to lose them since my first year into a new career.

Not very successful.

I guess you can say that as one gets older, she becomes wiser, and less calculative about the weighing machine.

But...I'm still very much eager to lose some values on the scale.

So....

No chocolate. Nothing now. It's bedtime. Let's go to sleep, my dear brain.

Can I live a different life each day?

2009-07-07T07:43:00.000-07:00

I want to live a different life each day
Be a different person each day
Maybe I can change the clothes I wear
Or the way I dress
Maybe I can take a brand new stride
Maybe I can put on more smiles to cheer everyone beside me
Maybe I can change the way I speak
If I can wake up to a different start every morning
To a different life
How fun it would be
Maybe I can do so
By changing the way I dress each day
By changing the mood I feel each day
By taking a different stride each day
Putting on more greeting smiles each day
Speaking more cheerfullly each day
Having different thoughts each day
Then I can be a different person
Each day

Edie

2009-07-05T20:05:00.001-07:00

Came across a movie called 'The Factory Girl' starring Sienna Miller. I got curious (the name 'Edie' for a female already sounds like a novelty) and started googling for the 'real' Factory girl they were referring to in the movie. Then I caught a glimpse of Edie Sedgwick. I got more interested, and start to find more articles and photographs of her online.

This is my favourite picture of her. I love the matching of the simplicity of a plain black tank top with huge elaborated earrings.

She has done modelling for magazines like VOGUE in her time, and I enjoy her poses.

Each pose is her signature.

Would love to find more of her photos for collection sake.

Korean Fashion

2009-07-05T08:13:00.001-07:00

Starting to notice the uniqueness of Korean fashion - especially in the men's line.
Adore the mix and match because it seems rare.

I also enjoy watching their poses. For each set of garment, they are able to conjure up a variety of poses to portray the mood. In each pose, the model exudes a sort of manly charm and elegance that is unique to their individual style.

The actor/model above, Lee Jee Hoon, started a new clothing line Paris Story Homme which houses men's wear that are near French style. Love his sense of style and fashion, especially the mix and matches. The hairstyles he has tried on, short ones, very short ones, long ones, out-of-bed messy ones, has a uniqueness suited for him.

Let's chill for a while....

2009-07-04T19:47:00.000-07:00

Back to Old English times

2009-07-04T18:44:00.000-07:00

Walk through the doors, and you find yourself in an English eatery nearby a train station. In seconds, you'll feel for a warm scented tea. The entire backdrop of the cafe, from the cutleries to the furniture, to the washroom, are all styled in the old English way. There are fresh flowers in huge bouquets on most visible counters, delicious scent of cakes and tea in the air, and the usual clinking sound of the cutleries.

In the morning, before the train arrives to bring you to the next English town, you'll sit down for some nice sausages, eggs and ham to fill your empty stomach. Then, a sip of warm tea or coffee to comfort the tummy for the journey afterwards.

In the noon, you want to get to town for a business meeting, and while waiting for the train, you get a quick munch of some healthy sandwiches, and not forgetting a taste of the awakening coffee to stay spirited througout the day.

At night, as you step off the platform, the smell of roasted meat and potatoes lured your hungry stomach to the doorstep of the cafe again. You order a glass of wine, and twirl it leisurely, as you wait for your final meal of the day.

Enjoy....

I am a slug

2009-05-05T06:23:00.000-07:00

I am a slug.
I used to take my own time to crawl an inch, enjoying the rocky, grassy scenery along the way.
I used to remind myself constantly to take things slowly, because I believe that the most important way to live life is to be happy.
But as I continue dragging my weight across the rough ground, I cannot help but wonder - why am I doing this; where is my finishing line?
The beautiful surrounding starts to blur into patches of red and black as the heavy weight of my body becomes significant. I shift my thoughts to the itch felt from scrubbing myself against the hard and cold concrete. The increased exertion of strength is also beginning to weary my poor muscles.
When can I stop? Somehow I know I can't. Or maybe...I wouldn't stop?
Who can tell me to stop? I guess no one could. Except...myself.
However, looking ahead, I see the bin of food with a swarm of black birds hovering above it.
Stretching my muscles, I heave a ton weight of sigh, and continue on.
Inch by inch, ache by ache.
Ah... when can I stop?

Fragrance of love fills the air with the blissful chimes of wedding bells

2009-04-17T06:20:00.000-07:00

Cherish the honour to be engulfed in such magical moments of romance...
May the bliss never ends...
Congratulations to the newly-weds. I especially love the video - it captured the precise moments of happiness and the essence of a wedding. The look on the groom's face when the bride showed up with a parade of angels, all covered in soft white lace and silk and sweet smiles, really touched all those who witness it.

Part 2 coming up. Yup you guessed it - attended two weddings in a span of one month.

The first one was refreshingly teary; and the second one was refreshingly hectic.

Some natural sights in Malaysia...you have to see it for yourself to feel its beauty

2009-03-09T06:53:00.000-07:00

2009-03-09T06:46:00.000-07:00

Times when I feel very good about life...

2009-03-09T06:43:00.000-07:00

I was walking home from a KTV session that ended at midnight...
Taking casual strolls and listening to Fang Da Tong's 'Little Worm' ... with the cool breeze gently blowing on my face...
Life suddenly feels good...

Who has the roundest face of all?

2009-03-09T06:37:00.000-07:00

A friendship never lost

2009-03-09T06:29:00.000-07:00

I do hope we can continue to meet each other, update each other of our individual lives, and console each other of the bad experiences we had.

Life is sometimes incomplete without these people and the bits of laughter they excite in your heart.

Dawn...

2009-03-09T06:22:00.000-07:00

Never had a chance to view the break of daylight... once in a few years probably.

A look at the vibrant colours of the sunrise you feel completely refreshed to start off the day with happy thoughts and joyful strides.

A glow in the dark

2009-03-09T06:15:00.000-07:00

I was on my way to work and came upon this. Couldn't help a click on the camera button...

Brotherly love

2009-03-09T06:09:00.000-07:00

Chinese New Year happening...

2009-03-09T06:02:00.000-07:00

The 'BIAN' sisters - Da Bian and Xiao Bian...

My 'rare' Family Day Out in Singapore

2009-03-09T05:57:00.001-07:00

We're all ecstatic by the cheap delicious sushi served by SUKI. Can't missed it for the world...

Everlasting...

2009-03-09T05:39:00.000-07:00

A new look for a brand new start...

2009-03-09T05:34:00.000-07:00

After going through so many haircuts and painful experiences, this is by far the most satisfied cut I had.
The bad news is...it won't last long...
Better take a snap for rememberance...

Another beautiful occurence in the heavens

2009-03-09T05:27:00.001-07:00

Where is this place? I leave it to your imagination...

This is by far the prettiest pink I've seen from the skies... the softest sunset.

An Unexpected Occurence

2009-03-09T05:08:00.001-07:00

I was on my way to Golden Mile Complex from Bugis Junction, dreading my feet to complete a boring task of buying bus tickets for a return trip to Malaysia, least expecting to catch the beautiful setting of the sun.

About love stemming from hate of the harsh reality

2008-10-27T03:48:00.000-07:00

'Love at first sight..'

'You're that special someone in my life'

'I know that you are the one the moment you step into my life'

'You were meant for me'

'We were meant to be'

'You complete me'

These are the words of romantic expression we often hear in stories about love; andthey can be easily understood once said.

'The Painted Veil' created an expression of love more powerful and genuine...

"... forgive me."

Just two words, yet you can feel more...

He loved her; she does not. He let her know how he felt, so did she. And they marry.

He went all out to please her and win her affection; she did her best to make herself happy, even if it meant hurting the person who most cared for her.

Her selfishness, coupled with naiveness, made him loathe the existence of his love for her....and he brought her into his world of grieve and helplessness.

Time helped her understood him, everything about him, and also made him fell in love with her once again...

Their love matured and strengthen with scars from the past..

Then, time created an unbreakable vow of love between them with the two words....

"The Painted Veil" is not another love story which you can imagine. It explains the meaning of true love in a non-fiction context and gives us hope that such strong bond between a man and woman does truly exist in the world consumed by spirits from the Pandora's Box.

Random tricks from the mind

2008-08-22T06:11:00.000-07:00

Hard to pretend ignoring something...
you knew,
you've seen,
that's there.

It's easier to camouflage...
the surge of emotions running through your veins,
the sudden heating up of your cheeks,
than the tendency to look at you when you are near.

I am never myself before you.

Does this means something that everyone knows,
everyone speaks of,
everyone feels?

Or it's just simply admiring something I can never have?
That I never did have,
yet I wish I had.

Meant to be?
Is there such a thing?
Or is it just a belief?
Should I believe?
Or should I just follow and believe?

I want to believe.
But I can't.
I don't know how to.
Where to start?
I can see the end before it actually begins...
So where to begin?

Soon the world becomes a belief...
even our beliefs will become myths...
Long lasting is a myth...
So...
I can't see its future...
I don't think there is a future...

So why bother believing in it?

Morning Dew

2008-08-22T05:47:00.000-07:00

Hard to deny...
There were times I really wanted to be a stranger to the world around me...
Just like a passer by of a shop,
No one cares if I dig my nose, or sing to myself...
Such loneliness is captivating to a mind yearning for peace and tranquility...

The mind then drifts off into its own thoughts,
Leaving the present to fast forward on it own, rapidly fading into memories...
When the first light of dawn strikes,
The mind then pushes its thoughts into the background,
I can suddenly feel the cold air blowing carelessly on my face...
It's time to catch the train again....

Spending time with my own thoughts,
sorting them out to put my life in order again,
Is better than having an apple a day...
If we ignore the cries of our delicate mind,
losing ourselves to the minds of others'...
we strive for their sake....
Soon,
we start forgetting our own breathing pace...

I love the feeling of emptiness before the break of a new day...
With no one I knew, standing beside me, reminding me,
I let nature's serenity seeped into my skin...
And...
I am ready for a brand new sunrise...

Too much to do...too little time to finish....

2008-03-10T05:32:00.000-07:00

It seems that no matter where I am, no matter what I am, and no matter what I do, there is always much to be done within a short span of time. Then we rush through time, and forward our lives to the finishing line, without actually appreciating where we lost time to.

Happy Chinese New Year!

2008-02-11T01:20:00.000-08:00

This festive season started well since I slept through most of my journey back to Malaysia. Waiting to arrive at the destination in a moving bus, with absolutely nothing to do except listening to your MP3, is excrutiatingly boring. I sometimes dream of owning a teleportation system that allows me to travel back home with a flick of a button. One minute I'm in Singapore, the next minute I'll be in Malaysia. So cool!

Anyway, the trip this time was quick because I fell asleep a couple of miles after Yong Peng (after the movie finished), and then woke up to my dad calling on my mobile to realise that I've already passed KL - a few more stops before Ipoh! (HURRAY!)

My brother and sister picked me up, together with a surprising guest - my cousin whom I've never seen since 2006 Chinese New Year.

He didn't look like his age; he didn't really change much since I last saw him. We chatted and update each other of our lives before he left us for his home.

When my siblings and I reached home, our parents have already done the cooking and it was time to eat! Tuan yuan fan is what we chinese call; and it is literally translated to "reunion dinner".

My dad spent most of the time on the chicken (rooster actually), which has a funny autobiography before it ended on our dinner plate. My dad bought it alive and well from a market in Gopeng, the day before CNY eve. It had crowed non- stop in the morning of the Eve, as if knowing it's death time is nearing, and interrupted my siblings sleep, whose rooms are located near to the rooster's cozy cage.

Well, after that my mother slaughtered it, and handed it over to my father who went on to cook it. My dad is really disciplined when it comes to cooking, and strictly abides to the cooking book; he turned and turned the huge chicken in the pot of boiling salt water every 8 minutes - without fail.

At the end, my brother point at the cooked rooster, and jokingly cried, "HA! Not so great after all, am I right? Making so much noise this morning!"

The dinner was really sumptous and delicious. And after doing the dishes, we all sat before the TV watching Chinese movies and later on "PRIME" starring Uma Thurman and a cute guy. My brother and I stayed up till 3 to finish the show, before we knock the beds. My sister stayed till 4 watching her own shows from her laptop - as usual.

The first day of CNY started with my mum knocking on my door, and presented me with her ang pow. I wished her Happy Chinese New Year before I return to beneath the thick covers.

I must say I really missed home. Especially the luxury of my bed, the air conditioning, and the superbly thick covers. The warmth of my family was greatly missed, and I am glad to be home, even for a short period of time.

That morning, after washing up and changing into new clothes, we headed to meet with my aunts and uncles, and cousins, from my dad's side, for a vegetarian breakfast. The place was already packed with people when we arrived, but that did not stop us from getting our food. After waited for an hour or so, we finally got ourselves a seat (as usual my family arrived early just to reserve seats for our relatives), and proceed to giving orders.

After food, my parents and other aunts and uncles left for shopping at a nearby shopping mall; while me and my siblings took off to our cousins' house.

We did long chats with our cousins, which was unusual because never have I talk so much to my cousins before. We didn't really have much in common except food. But this year, the chats were friendly and jovial, and I really laughed a lot.

Of course, we gambled a bit. It is a must to gamble and squander all your any pow money. This is a time to flaunt the wee bit of wealth that you inherited from parents and married relatives in red packets. My cousins were enthusiastic as ever; there were cries of joy when money was won from the "banker", and light- hearted angry words when luck gone worse.

A cousin of mine, whom I have never seen for almost 2 years, suddenly returned home for t fthis CNY, thus there was also a more reunion feel for this year's festive season.

This CNY also gave me an opportunity for my housemates to visit my home, and for me to treat them to a sumptous meal of Gai Xi Hor Fun - one of Ipoh's famous food. I was quite disappointed about the treat and their visit, mostly because of my part. I made them wait, albeit the fault was not intentionally made, and after sometime I delayed their lunch time, thus they were very hungry by the time we reach the makan place.

However, they were very understanding, and accepted my apologies, to which I was grateful for. I was also rushing for time because my family has to drive down to KL city to have dinner with relatives from my mum's side. The loss of time to spend with my friends was adding pressure onto me, thus the visit was not as I've planned.

Next year will be much better, I hope.

A week of love

2008-01-19T07:53:00.001-08:00

The first time I heard the song was during my holidays spent back in Malaysia. My brother was in the driver's seat next to me, and we were chatting about the issues in our own lives - until the song was aired on the radio.
I suddenly pointed out to him that I like the tune of the song. And forgotten about it a second after that.

The second time I heard it was during my shopping hours spent with one of best friends. I went up to the person standing behind the cashier counter and asked him to give me the name of the song and the singer. He left his position to find the answer from his colleague. When he returned, I was ecstatic. I guess after you listen to the song you will know why I felt the way I did at that time.

The song is by James Morrison, and the title is "You give me something".
If you listen to the words carefully, it unfolds a story about an affair between a couple where the girl subtly confesses her love for the guy through her actions. She patiently waits for long hours just to spend a few moments of precious solitude with him; she holds him only at times when she thinks he's not aware.

The song goes on to tell that the guy actually guessed the underlined meaning behind her every move.

You give me something
That makes me scared alright

He confesses to have "meant to tread the water", but now he has "gotten in too deep". This sounds good for the girl. However, albeit admitting that "for every piece of me that wants you", he stops himself from showing it because "another piece just backs away". Soon, his lack of returned affection to the girl starts filling his consciousness ("I can say I've never bought you flowers"), but it is only because he "can't work out what they mean". He further explains his sorrow ("I never thought that I'd love someone - that was someone else's dream"), which binds him at a distance from true love. I see such a dilemma as another form of confession - its existence is only stigmatised once true love is felt.

(You give me something
That makes me scared alright)
This could be nothing
But I'm willing to give it a try
Please give me something
Cos someday I might call you from my heart
But it might a second too late
And the words that I could never say
Gonna go out anyway

The music beautifully unfolds the love story between the couple. The flexibility and simplicity of its melody allows every note to be expressed in raw emotions. The trumpet, being the most obvious sound aside from the singer's voice, is inherent with the singer in narrating the story, as well as depicting the various emotions felt at each stage. Thus, with the other instruments in a perfect blend, the romance behind true love confessions is not hard to feel.

At the last note, I sincerely hope that they tie the knot with true love as a witness to their bondage.

Today, I watched a romantic comedy called "27 Dresses". This movie was about a young lady who had been to 27 weddings, and is "always a bridesmaid, never the bride". She kept all the bridesmaid dresses, reminisces upon the event she had been to, and romanticises each of them. She particularly loves the articles under the "wedding" section of the newspaper, who incidentally was written by a cynical, wedding-hater journalist. This guy was attracted to her from the beginning because of her selfless attitude, and eventually persuaded her into doing some reflection about her bridesmaid life. He did this by adding some reality into her fantasies.

In the end, love perserveres through it all when the leading lady finally found the one. The show was based on a intrestingly cute idea, and built wonderfully from it. The scenes were refreshing, and conversations were witty and fun. It was enoyable throughout, but it was the last scene that touched the audience.

Weddings are all the same; if you have been to many, the procedures start to become routinised, and so are the roles played by all those who attended. But this show reminds you the meaning of weddings - they celebrate the finding of true love, which is, as cliche as it sounds, is really hard to find. No matter how routinised the programmes will always be, in the end, it is the love and affection gleaming from the blissful couple at each other that grabs the softest part inside of you. Then, you laugh and cry at the same time, sending off your best wishes to fortunate them.

This definitely is a week of love. Albeit through songs and movies. I hope that those who already listened to the song, and watched the movie, feel the love too. It's always nice to appreciate those around you, and understand the love they've given.

Hello 2008!

2008-01-14T03:52:00.000-08:00

For the first time in 24 years did I spend the New Year countdown without my family beside me.
The previous New Year countdowns were normally spent lazing around with my parents, and bitching about with my siblings. My mum will then, as always, turn to us with the biggest query she has in stall for us each year - what is my New Year resolution?
It is a very good tradition to keep up with, and I really thank you my mum for the effort in making us keep track with our lives using this little self-reflection.
Now, in the coming of 2008, even without my mum standing beside me, I actually hear her inside my mind. And she is asking me the question again.
What is your New Year resolution, girl?
Well, to start off, my first resolution is to keep my blog updated - as frequently as possible. I do have a blog, but never really gotten to keeping it updated with my own life.
2007 marked a very strange, yet one of the exciting years in my life - I visited Taipei; which was my very first vacation abroad, and my 'first' being the first time I went away with my friends and not my family. I love to travel with my family; not so much with friends. So this vacation leaves a very significant mark in my life.
I also went on my first business trip. It's not as formal as I've witnessed in TV shows, because I do not meet clients in suit and tie, the venue was not a meeting room, and we weren't discussing about huge proposals, nor shook hands in agreement. Nothing of the sort, at all. I just went on a trip back to my hometown because my company was holding an event in KL, and I was chosen to be part of the team to facilitate the success of the project. Nonetheless, the fact that I was on a business trip kinda made me feel as if I've really grown up. And it made the first mark in my working life.
Another significant mark I made in my working life was my resignation from the company. The decision was pondered over for sometime - about 6 months - and when I finally got around to doing it, I understood the meaning of the phrase "taken the whole load off your shoulders". I literally felt it. I am very surprised at the large amount of stress that has been comsuming me since the beginning of 2007.
Lastly, in the midst of 2007, I made an amazing discovery about myself, and thus decided upon the turn to make into the path leading my future. I've decided to go into the education industry and become a teacher.
It was quite a tough decision to make because the first time I come across the idea, I was about to graduate from university, and teaching seems more like a second option. I was eager to start my working life and enjoy its benefits. My ideas of that wonderfully perfect world came to a full stop when I first tasted the harsh realities of the world outside school compound.
Soon, I start to question my own abilities and the purpose of my life. When I meet my friends who have already started walking down the path towards the future they've chose, I began to wonder if I am going to be where I am now for the rest of my life. Suddenly, I felt lost. I felt that my life is losing its grasp on meaning. I am completely clueless about my future, and am depressed about losing it to the monotonous routine I am drowned in.
Things began to take its shape again when I sort answers for new questions; realistic and purposely questions.
What am I here for? I always believe that everyone of us is here for a reason. We are all here for a purpose.
What can I do to make my life more meaningful?
How can I make my life more interesting? Most importantly, what can I do to keep it interesting in the years to come?
The answered dawned upon me one morning as I was travelling to work in the MRT. I like to be a guidance to others. I realised that people respond to my guidance well, because I can communicate effectively with them.
I am a very sensitive person, and I tend to get emotional very easily. I weep at the slightest care and concern shown to me. I am able to fill myself into others' shoes, and think and feel as they do, thus I can communicate effectively with them. I used to see these as my weakness. But towards the dawn of 2008, I convinced myself to face them as my strengths.
What can I do to give a purpose in my life by making use of my strengths?
I arrived at the answer that has been in my sub-conscious mind all along - teaching.
My loved ones were appalled at my decision and persuaded me to reconsider the options. I am glad to have perservere with it.
It is something that I have confidence in delivering, and will have interest in doing so for a very long time too.
So much of what has happened in 2007 was not recorded in my blog, thus I do feel a bit of remorseful about it, and I envy those who did.
My second resolution is to keep my room as clean and tidy as possible for the whole of 2008 and beyond. I shall get rid of the lazy bone in my spine, and start keeping all my stuff clean, fresh and dust-free. My sister will be truly glad about this because she had once threatened to accomplish the task for me, the one thing I really would want to do for myself.
Lastly, I shall continue to raise my EQ. Especially when I'm travelling in a public transportation. Although there a few people who has never failed to introduce me to the various ways of displaying rudeness and impoliteness, I decided to learn to keep my distance from them, and maintained my temper at the lowest point.
3 resolutions for the new year - and in the coming days, I hope to make them a habit till the next year.

Green Rose

2007-11-20T21:51:00.001-08:00

My mother introduced me to this intense drama. The plot is great, the cast is strong, the acting is awesome, and with the lead actor oozing immense charisma and charm in every scene, there is no reason not to watch it. I nodded my head then, thinking otherwise.

It's not that I do not trust my mother's choice of great dramas. My doubts actually lies within my loyalty towards Japanese Dramas - I am a true die-hard fan; although I limit myself to only certain genre of them. I find the strong portrayal of reality in Japanese dramas more captivating than the dramatic arrangements in Korean dramas.

Well...apparently after watching Green Rose, I have to drop my pride and apologise to all the Korean fans out there.

I managed to persuade my housemate to buy the set of VCDs. She had the urge to buy 'something' at that time. Unable to figure out which 'something' she should spend her money on, she turned to me for help. I immediately pointed to the set of 'Green Rose' VCDs lying silently before me, stacked in midst of the other popular Korean drama VCDS. She took a short glance at me before picking it up. "Are you sure?" Her eyes were questioning mine. I nodded and told her my mother's remarks. Without any second thought, she placed the box of VCD onto the counter and paid for it.

That was months ago.

Last week, being superbly bored at home, I decided to watch a video to pass the time. Looking through my own collection, I realised that I've watched most of the shows umpteen times. Re-watching them, once again, doesn't seem like an attractive idea. Until my eyes caught the 'Green Rose' VCD box sitting on the table - where my housemate last left it after the purchase.

I shall watch this show then. Even as I slot in the first piece of CD into the player, my mind was already anticipating boredom.

But...

The first scene caught my curiosity. Because like one of the very few Korean Dramas I love, "All In", this starts off with the leading male actor running through crowds of people bustling in the airport background. He seemed to be chased, and was racing against time in pursuit of something. The actor did amazing stunts like jumping over a line of trolleys, and swimming through the incoming swarm of people during the getaway. Finally, he hijacked a car from a couple about to be wed, and speed off.

We soon see the intensifying car chase between the man and the people chasing after him. Only now we know that he is a wanted criminal by the police. They are gaining upon him, but despite the many times they try to corner him, his determination wins his freedom. When the police finally succeeded in stopping him at the bridge, the man dragged himself out of the car, and even with many guns pointing at him, he launched himself upon the edge of the bridge.

He then tells his audience what is going through in his mind as he peers down at the deep vast ocean. His heart cries out painfully to his mother, and a woman named Oh Soo Ah. Different scenes from his memories flicker by on the screen, and you might start guessing that Oh Soo Ah is his lover.

Then the big question arises - what happened to him in the first place?

The director appears to hear your doubt, and rewinds the story back to a year ago. The man, called Li Joong Hyun, being just employed by one of the largest electronic companies in the city, SR, was in midst of celebration when he first met his future lover, Oh Soo Ah.

After a stormy incident whilst climbing a mountain for one of SR's orientation programmes, Joong Hyun and Soo Ah got together. The story was forwarded to a year later when the couple had been together for almost a year, and the intimacy between them suggested a possibility of exchanging marriage vows.

Soo Ah appeared to be the one who suggested the proposal of marriage to Joong Hyun. But the only problem that lies in their relationship is Joong Hyun's ignorance of Soo Ah's background. He confessed his insecurities to Soo Ah, and voiced out his discomfort about not being able to send his future wife straight to the doorstep of her family. He questions her sincerity in continuing their relationship, and feigns anger until she gives in, telling him to visit her at her home during her father's birthday later next week.

It was then we see Joong Hyun, nervous about meeting his father-in-law for the first time, showing up at Soo Ah's house, only to discover that she is the daughter of SR's CEO. Feeling uneasy and immensely uncomfortable about the environment he was unprepared for, he left with the gift that his mother had spent the entire night before, preparing it for his visit.

After a couple of persuasions, Soo Ah managed to answer all the insecurities and doubts in Joong Hyun. And as a secret between themselves, they exchanged vows of eternal love before the sunset view. The same one that emerges when they first got together.

The cycle of unhappy events begin to take place after this.

We then see Joong Hyun being tricked into becoming a scapegoat for attempted murder of Soo Ah's father. The director show us 3 suspicious characters involved in the crime, the Finance Manager, the Marketing Manager, and the CEO's driver. The real murderer was not revealed till the very end, so throughout the show, the audience will be stuck making guesses among the 3 suspects.

It was an attempted murder because Soo Ah's father did not die from the incident, but saved by Joong Hyun, who slipped into unconsciousness after being knocked out.

The crime he was alleged to have committed sent Joong Hyun behind bars. Seeing how devastated and lost his son became, the mother decided to pursue all means in helping prove his innocence, and finally resort to committing suicide. The authorities released Joong Hyun for a few days to finish his filial business at his mother's wake and funeral. This indirectly provides a chance for Joong Hyun to slip out of the police radar, and find the real murderer to clear the charges tied to his name.

However, the Gods appeared to be against him when he was almost caught by the police. With them gaining hard on him, he managed to get only a few clues to the puzzle. On the verge of getting arrested for breaking out of prison, he was still unable to see the face of the real murderer.

We were then taken back to the scene from the very beginning where Joong Hyun jumps off the bridge into the freezing waters. We see him drowning in fury, for the injustice that he received, and also in grief, for his mother's death and his separation from Soo Ah.

Meanwhile, Soo Ah, who is painfully accepting the possibility of her father becoming a vegetable, and the reality of Joong Hyun's arrrest, then fell into a deep hole of depression state upon learning Joong Hyun's sudden death.

However, with a twist of fate, or maybe under God's will, Joong Hyun actually survived the fall and escaped to China.

To cut the story short, the 'Green Rose' is likely a recount of 'The Count of Monte Cristo'. Joong Hyun went through many hurdles, and finally rise to become a respectable figure in the business world of Shanghai. With the new name he acquired, and some good friends, he returns to Korea to implement his plan of revenge.

Ko Soo plays the role of a Mr. Nice Guy, Lee Joong Hyun, who eventually turned vengeful because of all the painful and unhappy events he experienced . His acting skills were tested when his character was arrested, when he learned of his mother's death in jail, and when he stands before his lover, for the first time after years of feigning death, but pretends not knowing her. Every heartache that he displayed, whether through his eyes, his actions, or facial expressions. was transmitted directly to his audience, and it is really hard not to feel for him.

Lee Da Hae is also perfect as Oh Soo Ah who is a rose amongst the thorns in the drama. She manages the elegance and gentleness of Soo Ah very well. The Korean fashion had once again project its uniqueness through Soo Ah's clothing line.

The bad guys of the drama played their parts well, and because of this, I have to say that the cast of this drama is truly strong.

The director was patient in telling the story, thus the drama was driven at a very spectacular pace. It unfolds with an unexpected twist, and leaves a powerful impression in the audience when the final credits rolled up.

It's a serious drama, with suspense and romance. And I really enjoyed the originality.

Feel the Korean Wave

2007-11-20T21:18:00.001-08:00

Unlike most of my close friends, I get the feel of the Korean Wave only once in a while. If I happen to watch, very willingly, one of the nice Korean dramas, and get hooked on the casting actor or actress, the wave hits me. After several incidents of the same kind, I compiled a list of signs and symptoms of me catching the Korean fever.

Sign 1. Watch the show over and over and over again.
Effect: Will punctuate a few lines from the drama script in all my daily conversations.

Sign 2. Visit all the drama related / actor or actress related websites.
Effect: An instant boost in the Internet and electric bills.

Sign 3. Download songs from the Drama's soundtrack and listen to them most of the time when awake.
Effect: Start singing their songs when bathing and exercising. (Even when Korean is a foreign language to me).

Sign 4. Watch variety shows related to the Drama as well as its casting actors/actresses. Then start to watch ALL video clips (eg. commercials, MTV) of the same actors/actresses.
Effect: More daily discussions about the Drama, especially the actors...and the actresses.

Sign 5. Download pictures related to the drama, actors, actresses.
Effect: Grab any chance to hang them up on my price possessions - bedroom wall, mobile phone, desktop, etc.

Sign 6. Look up on other dramas and movies starring either the same actor or actress.
Effect: Decreasing numbers in the bank account due to spending lavishly on VCDs and DVDs.

It's difficult not becoming a guru at the end of all the effortless study. I even feel proud being this specialist of a particular drama or the biology of some actor. But the awesome feeling doesn't last very long. Once reality seeps in, I find my logic self laughing hard at my emotional self on all the time wasted on such unrealistic ridiculous study.

But reality doesn't settle in me for long too. Strange, yet true. Because once another Drama sparked the interest in me, the cycle starts all over again. This time, the obsession might start with a Taiwanese Drama or Japanese Drama. It will take quite a long time before I regain the Korean thing again.

Well, I would like to enjoy the fantasies of a young girl while I'm still allowed to.

La la la Love Song

2007-06-24T00:03:00.000-07:00

Does the title sound familiar?

Well, you might recollect the strong relation it has with Mr. Takuya Kimura, and you are right! It's the theme song to one of his drama serials - Long Vacation. I just bought the VCD set last Monday, right after my Japanese test, and finished watching it yesterday.

I remember wanting to watch this particular serial when I was still wearing uniform to attend classes at college. At that time, this show was aired on TV during the late night, and alas, because most of my time was spent catching up with studies, I was unable to catch more than just the first episode of the entire serial.

Now, I am glad to have watched the entire show!

It's about a 30-plus year old model, Minami, who lost her bridgroom on her wedding day. You see her running down the streets in the traditional Japanese Wedding gown, as if racing against time for something. You are guessing that Mr. Kimura might be the groom, and he has overslept. Turns out that Kimura's character, Senna, is actually the roommate of Minami's missing groom. Her presence shocked Senna that morning, and due to such unforeseen circumstances, he was unable to perform well at his piano recital that very same morning.

The story began with these 2 people, how they met and eventually end up living under the same roof - yes, a man and a woman. It shouldn't be criticised at because Minami is actually much older than Senna, despite her sometimes immature mannerisms. They are seen as siblings in the beginning of the show.

Towards the end, they start to show affection for each other, and gradually find a soulmate and also a life-long companion in each other.

I will have to give this show a range of 8-9 as a verdict because the script was unique, the directing was simple and fun, and the cast's performance was superb; they are all well-known actors and actresses at their time.

The missing point was caused by the few naggy scenes between the main couple at the later parts of the serial - both characters were confused and emotionally tormented by many misunderstandings. The sorting out took many turns, which includes the usual "boy has a sudden rush to see the girl, and tell her how he feels, but pulls back on his urge when he sees another boy with her". It was the cycle of realisation of true love which is then lost due to insecurity, and then found again.

I guess the best scenes were when Minami showed up for the first time before Senna, how Senna apologises to her through playing the birthday song on the piano, and the few affectionate scenes between them. The messages delivered from these scene grabs your attention to the screen so much, you just react as you feel from the images.

The last scene was also my favourite; when the couple are smiling and running, hand in hand, towards a church to get married. Their smiles show how genuinely bliss their lives are, now that they have found each other.

The music throughout the entire show touches every layer of your emotions too - you are overwhelmed with sorrow and sympathy for Minami when Senna plays the Birthday song on his piano as form of an apology to Minami; you get goosebumps when they kissed passionately before the sparkles of the fireworks; and you laughed hard with tears when they confessed their love for each other on top of the world.

La la la Love song truly inspires the audience, because it does brings out the simplicities of love and also of everyday life through its peaceful cheerful tune.

Lastly, I sincerely love the script of this entire serial. The conversations exchange between the 2 main characters of the story are also suitable as quotes of life experience. I have to salute the scriptwriter for this.

~ If you are face with a sudden downfall in your life, and no matter what you do nothing seems to change for the better, take this period of time as a long vacation bequeath from God. During this time, you can try to make the best out of it, learn new things, or simply relax yourself. Let God take care of the rest, and things will slowly start to take a different turn...~ Long Vacation

How to love a Dinosaur?

2007-05-05T07:19:00.000-07:00

Beauty lies within the most natural smile of a person - concludes the Japanese drama, "In Love With Dinosaur".

Hard to imagine a dashing popular comedic writer falling in love with a woman who has absolutely no appeal in appearance. Even harder to imagine was the story has the male lead actually proposed marraige to the same woman with a reason stemming from an adoration of her smile and inner beauty. Yet, I realised, only much later, that the drama was scripted base on a true love story between a variety- show writer and a female comedian - whose looks won as much laughter as the actress playing the role in the drama.

Most of such comedies have the less appearance of character morphing into a stunning person with a sudden fashionable sense. But this drama totally caught me off guard - not only did the female lead remained beautiful only from the inside, she was happily married to the handsome writer with 2 children.

The story captured me from the start till the end, and I love the concept a lot. It was a very unique love story. Although it portrays a certain degree of reality (no matter how much we yearn to we can never resemble the models in fashion magazines), yet there is also a tinge of fiction - we are so blinded by appearances and stereotyping that loving someone for their inner beauty is becoming such a fantasy only told in stories and drama serials. A paradox, I would say.

Despite all the arguments, I still find the lovestory refreshingly innocent and beautiful. It is the innocence of such love that captures the attention of most women living in this century; those who are still single and longing for a soulmate. We've seen enough breakups to last us a lifetime, and we hardly find the words 'ever after' as promising as before. The conclusion of the drama lends us the courage to once again find the light and warmth for our love lives.

The fact that this drama is telling a story of 2 soulmates who actually found themselve in this real world binds me more to it. I was truly touched to the core and can never stop thinking about the marvel of it. The beauty of the story is truly beyond words. If there is a chance, I would love to meet the couple and congratulate them for finding each other. The path to discovery must have truly been exciting and adventurous.

Watch the show if you have the fate to come across it someday.

Thoughts... it's a rainy day

2007-04-21T00:26:00.001-07:00

What am I doing?
Where should I go?
Which path should I take?
What future should I have?
What life should I lead?

Lost.

The world is moving on even without me following it.
It never stops for even a second to let me reconsider the choices I make.
It never allows me to catch up.
Or rather, it's me who never seems to catch up with its footsteps.

What am I doing?

The clock is ticking and I'm still stuck on the same ground.

What should I do?

I have many things to fulfil but yet no courage to accomplish any.
I yearn to do many things, but never seem able to break free from the clutches of my worry.

Am I to admit defeat now and live an empty listless life?

Staying rooted is more difficult than being rooted off

2007-04-10T07:18:00.000-07:00

The big "E" has done it again - another plant rooted off the ground. Thing is, this time the growing plant does not even have enough time to stretch its roots deep into the soil.

Since my life in the new yet monotonous environment, not even for a year, I have witness 3 rooting ceremonies. The first one was performed with not a tinge of humanity, the second was considered a suicidal sort, while the last one happened within a split of second (it was rather dramatic, I can asure you).

The soil seemed to be prosperous in the beginning. But as my roots dug deeper into the ground, the wretched stench hidden beneath layers of fertile soil surfaced; as my stem shot nearer to the skies the entire field became more visible. Everything nice and wonderful seemed to disappear into a wisp of thin air.

I see plants with flowers - the magnificent colours of the petals seemed so likeable and pretty. Their stems are bursting with turgidity - signifying the abundance of nutrients they have sucked from the soil; their green leaves are fluttering peacefully in the gentle breeze - signifying the large amounts of water they have exhausted from their fellow plants and how good their growing spot is when it comes to capturing the sunlight.

Yet, I also see another population of plants shrivelling beneath - they appear to have received same amount of water, sunlight, nutrients as the energetic flowering plants. But from the way they are hiding away indignantly into the overpowering shadows, we see a different story. Once these die off, the soil replenishes its nutrients to grow more flowering plants.

I am not sure when one of these plants will start to divert me from reaching the sun and the skies. But the fight to get the most nutrients, water and sunlight will exist until the final day comes.

I miss the old times, when we laughed sharing the funniest moments in the boring environment. Yet, everything happens for a reason and things always change for the better - never for the worst. So all the best to my dear friend - I saw your strength and courage today which I believe will grow within you. Take care and I hope our friendship will never falter.

MY - day

2007-04-08T22:27:00.000-07:00

It was my birthday a day ago and I did the most unusual thing on that special day - I stayed at home, the entire day, watching drama serials and enjoyed being a couch potato throughout the 13- episode series.

I had no urge to venture beyond the premises of my flat, and no thoughts of going anywhere except staying in front of the tv set. Weird it must have seemed but the sofa appeared to capture more of my attention than Orchard Road.

I never like to remind my close friends and even family members of the date. I might be yearning for a little surprise to spice up my horribly boring life, or it could have been my shy- little self not knowing how to give away such reminders without seeming proud. It could have been just my pride - telling people when is your birthday is like begging them to remember showering you with gifts.

Truth is, I get embarassed whenever someone wishes me a "Happy Birthday" - I wouldn't know what to say. When I receive gifts, all I can think of is replying with lots of "thank you" - I get angry at myself because I know that the mere 2 words can never accurately express the joy I feel. But "thank you " is all I can ever think of at spur of the moment.

2 days before my actual birthday, I receive a grand surprise from my colleagues. It came so sudden I did not have time to prepare for it. They sang the song and I receive the huge chocolate cake from them without saying anything - as usual, I didn't know what to say. Dumbfounded, you might think, but I was actually trying hard to search for the right words to say.

Seconds passed - I'm asked to make a wish. I agreed, still not knowing what to say, and closed my eyes to make the special wish (can't say it out or it won't come true). Then I wait for the flashes from the camera to stop before I blow out the candles. More flashes ignited the dark room - and I still can't find something to say except "Thank you so much!".

They waited as if for me to say something, while I waited for them to tell me what to do. Another few seconds passed, I gave up trying to find the right word - "Erm, I'm suppose to cut the cake right?"

My boss couldn't hold back his toungue and bursted out "My God." Everyone shrieked with laughter. Just one of those moments which I wish I could find something nice to say to everyone but I can't.

On the actual day, my housemates prepared a cake for me too. As usual, I could say nothing except "Thank you" throughout the entire session.

My birthday came and went. I don't really feel it a special day because my parents calls me very often, and I frequently spend time with my friends. However, I mark it as "MY" day because I was born during the date. And also a date to remind me that I'm officially a year older, and another reason to find more ways to live life to the fullest.

My Sober Self

2007-03-10T01:52:00.000-08:00

How do you know if you are drunk? From TV shows and drama serials, it seems that eccentric bahaviour and weird mannerisms surface once a person gets drunk. So when you are drunk you will act weird. If you don't, you are disobeying the rules of life. Life says - once drunk, act weird.

I never believed that at all - until last night. I wouldn't say that I acted weird - I did not strip myself naked in front of everyone, nor did I try to kiss whoever came into my sight. No. I just laughed and talked. But, the difference between my sober self and drunkard self is the latter was more real than the former.

Once you drink enough to make your head weigh like tons, you are already towards a drunk state. The symptoms can be quite prominent - first stage is always a rush of heat to the face then a wave of dizziness hits the head. These creeps slowly into you, like a thief trying to rob you of your consciousness. If you let your guard down and continue sipping, consciousness will slowly be replaced by invisible steel bars.

Next stage towards drunk state - hammering in the head. With all the steel bars stored inside your head, it is a huge wastage if they are not transformed into something useful. Thus hammering starts. At this state of mind, you can't think. You might try to, but you would not be able to do so. To minimise the effect of all the hammering, you might as well sort the easiest remedy - not to think at all.

Thus, the so call "weird mannerisms" surface. You let yourself go freely - you start to voice your thoughts (deeply buried at the back of your head), you act as your mind tells you to or as you feel like (without thinking of any consequences), and either you keep the smiles on your face, laugh without knowing the real reason, or cry a sea of tears.

After last night's experience with the magical drink, I realised our drunk selves might be our 'true' selves. The world is a difficult place to live in, and to survive, there is a likelihood of us turning into cold and harsh robots with fake identities. We start to lose our true selves, or rather, more accurately, turn away from being who we are.

Last night, I kept the smiles on my face - which is what I seldom do when sober. The world to me is too harsh, and I enjoy living in the world of Walt Disney. I was more confident and so sure of myself when drunk - no longer a timid creature hiding behind layers of various personalities. I was even braver than usual and I ignored all sarcasms thrown at me. For a while, I never knew I was such a superwoman. I am actually the person whom I have always wanted to be.

Amazing.

The road to self discovery is truly amazing. I am glad my parents talked me into staying - thank you meee and dae-dee - I am now happily experiencing the wonders of life. And my dream is slowly becoming a reality.

(Photo taken from www.mangalocity.com/MangalocityNews.html)

Agree?

2007-03-08T23:16:00.000-08:00

I realised that the most difficult task for us is the ability to live amongst ourselves and stay happy everyday. I know that I spend 3/4 of my life complaining about the unfairness in life which is usually caused by another fellow being. Just today, I realised that I am not alone.

My friend was washed over by frustration when her supervisor doubted her ability to work with independence. She has her own reasons to be angry - to her, the man unconsciously insulted her capability. The man, on the other hand, being overly worried about the progress of the project, has his own reasons to say what he had said - although he puts it together in a wrong manner. Listening to her story, and trying to be in her supervisor's shoes at the same time, it dawned upon me how difficult it is actually to get 2 people to agree on the same thing.

We all have different pasts and experiences to lead us to the way we are now. And thus, the underlying differences in our thoughts. Even for twins, who shares similar features, have a diversity in thoughts and personalities. Thus, unless there is a point of compromise or mutual understanding between 2 parties, we will always be falling into an endless pitch.

All this while, I have been learning how to feel for others - not to compromise nor to seek mutual understanding - but to keep my mind healthy. If I understood the reason behind someone's harsh tone or incorrigible words, it acts as an excuse to keep the rage from infiltrating my mind.

People can agree on the same thing - but it always happens after a long duel. Such dramas exhaust the mind and is unhealthy for a growing human spirit. I will feel cold and unwell while struggling and coping with these emotional stresses. Worse, I might even reach a state of depression.

I hate knowing when someone misunderstood my actions and words. My mind is filled with scenarios of me succeeding in making people accept my thoughts and philosophies - the more I yearn for them to happen and it doesn't, I resort to frustration. In the end, exhausting my mind and body, I achieve nothing except precious time wasted.

I learnt to let go of the struggle of proving that I can change a person's thoughts. I accepted the one of the reality bites of life. Rather than encouraging people to change for me, why not be more sensitive to the roots of their thinking and emotions, take an understanding approach, thus turning away from rage and free your mind for other important things in life.

Despite the many people I tried to share this emotional conquest with, it still boils down to the same problem - people don't agree that easily. It happened when my brother tries to persuade our dad into accepting the fact that he is not a doctor- material. It happened when I tried to explain my reactions to some difficult situations. It happened when my sister tries to make us understand why she had decided to quit school and start working at an early stage. It happens all the time to everyone.

In the end, although acceptance usually stings, the pain is short term and happiness eventually falls into place more easily. I want to be a happy person because I am living my own life. If I can smile everyday, why not?

Always look on the bright side of life

2007-03-06T17:05:00.000-08:00

I am a pessimist.

For me, it is always easy to tell someone who is feeling down to look on the bright side; but when trying to apply the same theory to your life - it never works. Not because it cannot be applied here, but rather I don't know how to do so.

I remember reading a book that explains why we are always able to give advice but never able to receive them the same way. When God created man, he figured that it would be a good thing to actually hang an invisible balance of thoughts on man's shoulders. Thoughts of reflection of his own actions should be right in front of his eyes, so that man can clearly see it and improve on his behaviour. Whereas thoughts about others' behaviour should be kept on the other end of the balance - less prominent to the eye.

To cut the story short, a mistake was made, and we all end up having self- reflection thoughts kept away from our own eyes. And in conclusion, no man is able to see themselves as clearly as they are able to judge others.

I am always telling my friends under depression to look on the bright side of things, and events always happens for a good reason. But then I realised - the further you walk down the path of life, the more difficult it is to actually keep yourself happy and smile for the felt of inner- happiness.

It is always a good thing to learn how to view things positively and to accept changes without bearing grudges towards them.

I have already started the journey to this enlightenment, but fell out of the path since I've entered into the harsh reality of working life. Worth the while to find a compass to lead me back into the right direction again.

Wish me luck!

A New Beginning

2007-02-01T22:06:00.000-08:00

2007 marks a new beginning for everyone - not for me.

To me, advancing into 1st Jan 2007 is just the same like any other day. I still have to get to work early in the morning, make calls throughout the day from nine to six, dine in front of the TV after work at home, then watch the ceiling till the lids close to end yet another monotonous day.

Well, of course it didn't mean that I worked on 1st Jan - what I am trying to say is that I am not making any difference in my life, despite the significance of 2007 being the start of a new life. You are right - I do not have any new life to begin with in 2007.

It makes me wonder - how many of us actually dare to take the first step into a completely different world and start a new life.

I've always dreamed of becoming a writer. The path I took in the real world however, astrayed me from making my dream come true. Like a normal human being with emotions, the fist person I would always defend is myself of course - I pushed the blame to my parents. They have dreams of their own; and their dream is to have their children graduate from universities with a prestigious profession, like a doctor, or an engineer. Sad to say - this dream was shared only between the two of them.

As I get older, and my thoughts began to mature, I realised that my life lies entirely in my own hands. Who gets the real punishment when something goes wrong in my life? ME! It was me who did not stand up to my parents and tell them firmly that I want to become a writer. It was me who obeyed every single word they told me. It was me who did not fight for what I believe to be mine. It was me who allowed them to led me away from the path I have always - and still - dream of pursuing.

Looking at the classifieds and the job ad which shouted my dream back at me, I look back on all those years which I have spent mugging on those huge engineering textbooks and receiving astounding low grades for my language subjects - hesitation starts to settle in.

Should I take the first step back onto the path to dreams? Or should I just listen to my engineering- acquainted- common sense - no one will take an engineer without journalistic experience, so don't bother to write in for the job.

Life.....*sigh*

(Photo taken from http://juan.zauber.com.ar/uploaded_images/herecomesthesun-775891.jpg)

Angel

2006-11-26T02:08:00.000-08:00

如果可以我想要更清醒
如果可以我想要更轻盈
穿过雾穿过云看清你的心
是多情是多疑是给你讯息
我蠢蠢欲动的爱情就要飞向你
我美丽天使的心
再也不神秘只为你栖息
我温柔天使的心
只要你生生世世守著我
我永远为你甜甜蜜蜜日日夜夜真心爱著你
我不相信一瞬间的勇气
我只接受一辈子的约定
穿过雾穿过云看穿你的心
是真情是珍惜
不愿是游戏
我蠢蠢欲动的爱情就要飞向你
我美丽天使的心
再也不神秘只为你栖息
我温柔天使的心
只要你生生世世守著我
我永远为你甜甜蜜蜜日日夜夜真心爱著你

Met

2006-11-26T01:52:00.000-08:00

你不开心的脸，仿佛将我推到悬崖边缘
距离就算在靠近眼前，我们一样没交点
没有你的世界，就像寒冬没有春天依偎
少了你不在身边，我的四季只剩下冬天
悲伤喜悦回忆不断重演，静下来的世界
有我的思念，也有你的空虚无边

你有没有听见，寂寞的声音悄悄在蔓延
他住进我们之间，消耗着我和你的永远
你有没有听见，思念的呼唤传遍每条街
就算你走的再远，累了回头我就在你的身边

Everyday

2006-11-26T01:47:00.000-08:00

每天每天站在忙乱又无聊的路旁等你向我走来
每天每天一直看到你和你说话才算有个开始
每天每天我都没感觉我们有什么改变
我一直以为这是永远而我无法想想象你会离开

我已习惯你走在我的右手边
一起看无聊搞笑片约好去看地中海的蓝
我已习惯我们在一起像Old friend
分享生活里的一切我知道你每个笑有不同的意义存在

明白让你走会后悔(不愿意你离开)
这样的感情太可贵(我现在已了解)
我要的幸福每一天每一天慢慢发现

我已习惯你走在我的右手边
一起看无聊搞笑片约好去看地中海的蓝
我已习惯我们在一起像Old friend
分享生活里的一切我只要你在身边让你明白我的爱

(Photo taken from http://xad.xanga.com/5d8d05257003776598695/z51827870.jpg)

How Are You?

2006-11-26T01:41:00.000-08:00

바람이 머문 그시간 조차
나에겐 너무 모자란걸
한번의 미소 마지막 인사
사랑합니다 그대

시간이 지쳐도 사랑이 아파도
그시간 조차 추억인걸
마지막 인사 하네요
사랑합니다 사랑합니다

fly away fly away love

fly away fly away love
fly away fly away love

내생에 단한번의 사랑아
안...녕

Let your dreams live

2006-11-23T05:47:00.000-08:00

Have you ever thought of wanting to be someone else? Someone - whose life is clearly more extraordinary than yours; whose life is more exciting than yours; whose life is totally different from yours. I do - most of the time.

Why?

I have no idea. Probably it's the effect of watching too many movies when young. Or maybe it's the desire to get out of the continous cycle of routines. Or it's simply for the sake of being bored with the life I have now. Whatever it is, there are times, well most of the times, I wondered how nice it would be to live an investigator's life, like Sherlock Holmes, or a life of a wealthy man's daughter.

Desire is a strange feeling, yet the strongest and hard to deny emotion of all emotions. It usually stems from an innocent wish to make a change in one's life and then percepting the result of that change as something good, or even better. The perception churns to become something more wonderful when it is mixed with imagination. Soon, perception and imagination becomes one, and it slowly seeps into the other part of the mind which fights hard to keep the logical sense in a person. Once the yearning for a change develops into desire, the result of the change is already perceived as reality. No longer does the person fights reality to face it; instead, he flees from it into his own imagination, which he perceived as 'reality'.

What the heck.

What am I writing? I am not sure. But I do believe that a little desire and perception doesn't harm a person much. Does it not? I mean, a little want and need of a change in life may grow into aspirations and ambitions. With a bit of nuturing and constant weeding to keep it from astray, desires and perception can someday become dreams. And fulfiling dreams is something that nourishes the spirit of us beings; keeping us alive and well, and let the desire to live burn strong.